Love when dating on guys perspective GUYS DREAM
Ladies, pay attention.
''You seem to have only looked at one side of the equation, from a female perspective that painted men as tiring boors, psychotics and lecherous perverts,'' he wrote. ''I don't know if you have received any male opinion as to our perspective when Internet dating, but I am well qualified to render an opinion.
''First, I am 42 years old, much younger looking than my age, a summa cum laude college graduate and vice president of a local company. I exercise and consider myself reasonably fit. I have been Internet dating for several years and have enough experiences that could be wonderful fodder for a horror novel. A few of my experiences follow:
''Once, I was chatting with 'Cathy,' a 40ish single female. She seemed very interesting and was into many of the activities I was interested in. She kept asking me if I was a jealous sort of guy because she gets a lot of people looking at her.
''When we met, I knew why people would stare at her. She was a he. At least at one point recently in her life, she was a man.
''I should have known. The give-away was when she told me that she spent a month in Thailand having ' surgery.' I figured she didn't have health insurance and liked Thai food, so why not have surgery done cheaper than here and get a vacation out of it?
''During our meeting we had a drink and found many people staring at her. I guess a jealous guy wouldn't be able to handle that ÃÂÃÂ or her man-sized mittens. Her pictures were also heavily retouched, as I discovered upon further investigation. We never met for a second date.
''When a woman tells me that her friends have named her 'The One Date Wonder' because she never goes on a second date with a guy, I run as fast as I can because of an experience with another Internet date. This one told me when we met, and right up front, that I will not get a second date with her because no guy ever has. Very true considering she hasn't had a relationship that lasted longer than three months in her lifetime -- and she was 42 years old.
''Even with knowing that, it was OK with her that I paid for dinner and she couldn't even ante up a gratuity. Furthermore, I happen to know a '70s-'80s rock star (and still popular performer), whom she is a fan of, and I surprised her on the date with an autographed CD, autographed personally to her. She complained because the CD wasn't one she wanted, and the black Sharpie didn't stand out prominently enough against the artwork on the CD cover. So much for thoughtful intentions ÃÂÃÂ
''I know everyone has issues, and I would fully support anyone trying to better his/her life, but showing up an hour before we are to meet so you can slam four vodka tonics is just too extreme. This was someone I drove to Hoboken, N.J., to meet, and she was inebriated long before I got there. I almost had to fireman-carry her out the door to her apartment. This was something I couldn't do, however, because she informed me that she still lived with her boyfriend, and he is a steroidal very jealous type.
''I met a lawyer from Bucks County who was in AA, but forgot the part about abstaining from alcohol and drugs, as evidenced by her needing to pop a few Vicodin (for back pain) and washing them down with a few glasses of wine. She got really upset when I wanted to end the date early, and she created a scene by my car.
''Now, the weight issue. I would have to say, contrary to your reader friend who claimed that 50 percent of women are overweight, that eight out of 10 women are very overweight. If a profile states weight as 'average,' I take that to mean a few extra pounds. If it states 'a few extra pounds,' I take that to mean circus lady fat.
'' I wonder why people try to deceive with the posting of old pictures that shows them not how they are today. I, for one, don't want to meet a woman who has gained 50 pounds and three chins since her last picture was taken.''
As the women did, he complained about unrealistic expectations. He said many women's requirements are so rigid that they rule out almost everyone. Hence, One Date Wonders.
Why? He suggested the Internet has made it easier to meet people than it used to be, but also easier to dispose of them. In the old days, it was harder to find a date, so you gave it some time instead of making hasty judgments. Now, it's just on to the next person on the list.
If you want more of the male perspective, you can read all his stories on my blog at themorningcall.com.
Bill White's commentary appears Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays.